Someone in the crowd said to him, ‘Teacher, tell my brother to divide the family inheritance with me.’ But he said to him, ‘Friend, who set me to be a judge or arbitrator over you?’ And he said to them, ‘Take care! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of possessions.’ Then he told them a parable: ‘The land of a rich man produced abundantly. And he thought to himself, “What should I do, for I have no place to store my crops?” Then he said, “I will do this: I will pull down my barns and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. And I will say to my soul, Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry.” But God said to him, “You fool! This very night your life is being demanded of you. And the things you have prepared, whose will they be?” So it is with those who store up treasures for themselves but are not rich towards God.’ (Luke 12: 13-21)
Don't
you just love the dysfunctional triangulation in this story? This guy
tries to get Jesus involved in his family dispute, but Jesus wisely
avoids the issue. And everybody knows—or is part of—one of those
families where somebody dies and the survivors almost knife each
other over the inheritance. Jesus reminds us that, whatever the value
of the estate, in the end it's just stuff.
I was
fortunate with my parents' estate. My half brothers, effectively
disinherited by my father's neglect to write a will, graciously
refused an offer from my sisters and myself to split our mother's
inheritance with them. My sister Lorraine, the executrix of our
mother's estate, refused to take an executrix fee on the grounds that
“Mommy would want us to split everything equally.” I am forever
thankful that my siblings' graciousness spared the entire family the
emotional bloodbath which so many other clans have endured following
the death of a parent.
The
worst part of dealing with the “estate” was the necessity of
putting my mother in an assisted living facility and selling the
family home following my father's death. I think that now, seventeen years after my mother's
passing, I can finally admit that I am the surviving adult child of a
hoarder.
It's
not that Mother was particularly attached to the accumulated stuff in
her home. In truth, she loathed it. But as she aged, some of her Depression-era demons began to overcome her, and she began to retreat emotionally from her environment. Mother was an artist and an extremely
creative woman by nature. She painted, crafted, sewed, and designed.
Her greatest artworks were brilliantly executed dollhouse miniatures
in 1”:1' scale which astounded everyone who saw them with their
beauty and detail. Unfortunately, she was never satisfied with the expectations of women of
her generation. She was forever uncomfortable with being a
"homemaker." She never learned to drive an automobile, and, I
think, began to feel herself more and more trapped at home and in a
role not of her own choosing. Her outlet was to paint or create, working by herself long into the night, smoking countless cigarettes while the chaos crept in around her. In her later years she developed
emphysema.
When
her own body betrayed her, Mother tried to control whatever she
could. She refused to relinquish control of her home and its
accumulating clutter. When it was suggested that half of the things
around her should be thrown away, she would reply, “Yeah? Which
half?” But she would not allow anyone to dictate a course of
disposal. Finally, whens she was safely ensconced in assisted living
and her house sold, I hired a truck to haul away the amassed junk.
She was furious with me for taking away her power over her stuff.
It's so easy to let possessions possess us. We amass so we may have control, but how much control do we really have?
Is there anyone's whose soul will NOT be required of them? Anyone who will not grow old? Will possession and wealth keep away cancer? Can we keep our kids safe all the time or keep our parents from dying? Can we control the economy? Or the weather?
Better we should be rich in the things of God. Have we loved as selflessly as Christ loved? Have we contributed to the causes of justice, mercy, health, or peace? Have we possessed an appreciation for the goodness of God which is greater than our individual circumstances? Have we inspired others in hope?
My parents may have left me a mess to clean up, but they also left me a legacy of faith in the crucified and resurrected Jesus. For any faults they may have had, they bequeathed to me the example of decency and morality which lives within my memory and gives me courage when I am discouraged.
And they gave me four siblings whom I love and respect.
How blessed I am!
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