Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Mourning on Memorial Day

(Yes, I know that this Sunday--May 26--is the Feast of the Holy Trinity, and I just might try to post some thoughts on this doctrine at a later date. But please indulge me as I write on a subject which has been very much on my mind.)

Memorial Day weekend is coming up, and I'm still thinking of Cassie.

You see, there are all kinds of deaths that are suffered for the sake of our country by those who put on her uniform.

The young soldier whom I'll call "Cassie" (not her real name) rang the doorbell at Faith Lutheran Church several months ago. She needed some help. I felt sorry for her as she was obviously ashamed and embarrassed by her circumstances. I mean, no one wants to ask for charity, do they?

She was a small, waif-like blond girl. She showed me her military ID card, and explained that she was a single mother on leave to visit her young child and her mother. She was stationed at a major military base several hundred miles away in another state. She was broke and needed gas money to get back to base before being AWOL.

Now, lots of folks come by the church with hard luck stories. It is usually not our policy to hand out cold cash. But Cassie was so obviously nervous and seemed so fragile and so vulnerable. Besides, her Army ID looked pretty genuine to me, so I decided to err on the side of Jesus' injunction:

"Give to everyone who begs from you; and if anyone takes away your goods, do not ask for them again." (Luke 6: 30)

I invited Cassie to my office where I could access some of the petty cash from my discretionary fund. I made sure that I stopped at my administrator's office first--not because I needed to talk to her, but because I wanted to reassure this very nervous young soldier that she was not alone in the building with a strange man. I left my office door wide open, and made certain never to stand too near Cassie or get between her and the open door.

In an effort to ease her nerves, I told Cassie that my nephew happened to be on active duty at the same installation where she was stationed. Then I showed her the picture of my daughter which I keep over my desk. My daughter, Sandra, was recently honorably discharged from the Army, and I'm very proud to show a picture of her taken when she was on deployment in the Middle East.

"She's very pretty," Cassie said.

"Thank you," I replied. "I think she looks just like her mother." But then I recalled what Sandra had told me about the high level of sexual harassment endured by women in the military. Something was telling me that this girl's nervousness was not just about the embarrassment of having to ask a stranger for a handout.

"I hope you're taking care of yourself in the Army," I said. "My daughter says there's a lot of victimization of women in the military."

"Thank you for your concern, Sir," she said, "but it's already happened to me."

I did not pursue the subject. I gave Cassie what money I could spare from the constantly depleted fund, said a prayer for her safety, and sent her on her way. I keep hoping that she made it back to base okay.

But I feel for this young person. In a slow job market, this single mom offered four years of her life to defend her country. She did so in good faith. She knew going in that there would be some danger involved, but I doubt she thought it would come from her own brothers-in-arms.

Recently, I saw on PBS the documentary The Invisible War. This film tells the story of the thousands of young women--and men--who have been sexually victimized while serving in our armed forces. Watching it is a painful experience. One feels pity for the victims and anger at both the perpetrators and the inability of the Department of Defense to effectively deal with this epidemic. Last year an estimated 85,000 veterans requested treatment from the VA for illnesses and injuries related to Military Sexual Trauma. 40% of those victims were men.

So on this Memorial Day, I will mourn not only for those who gave their lives in defense of our nation, but for those who have died a little each day--having lost faith, self-respect, and dignity. These deaths are no more profound than those who gave their lives on the battlefield. For those who suffered these deaths were also dedicated to our country. I pray that we do not forget them.

If you are concerned about this issue, I encourage you to learn more and click on The Invisible War link. There are suggestion about how you can get involved. In the meantime, I offer this Memorial Day prayer:

Almighty God, as your Son, our Savior Jesus Christ, suffered humiliation and pain, we ask you to bind the wounds of our young men and women whose hearts have been torn apart by their service in the military. As we thank them for their service, let us not forget their sacrifice. Heal them, comfort them, restore them, O God of All Healing. Pour into our hearts your mercy, your compassion, and your justice, that we may put right the wrongs which have been done. Make us a nation worthy of the sacrifice which our young warriors have made. We ask this through the precious blood of your Son, our Lord. Amen.

Thanks for reading, my friends. A blessed Memorial Day to you all.

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